w o w

books for me, has always been the best teacher, the most delightful companion; amusing, entertaining and enlightening.
And sometimes, you read a phrase where you just go, wow...that's it. That's exactly it.


"My Heart Is Afraid that it will have to suffer," the boy told the alchemist one night as they looked up at the moonless sky.

"Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams."

life, as it is

sometimes, I feel as if there's not enough time in my life for me to do everything I want to do; to see all that I want to see. Where in the world am I going to find enough years to fit it all in???

I want to climb Mount Kinabalu (yeah, start small). I want to walk the entire length of the Great Wall of China. I want to see The Terracotta Warriors. I want to stand and gaze at the shifting colours of the Taj Mahal, inhale the aromas of Egypt and wander through the pyramids. I want to see the remains of the Berlin Wall, stand under Eiffel Tower and the Arch (glorified or not, I still want to see it). Walk the Seine river and the Left Bank. Lose myself in the Lourve. Stand at 'the edge of the world' on the Scottish Highlands. Listen to the flutes of Ireland. See Galway for myself.

Feel the vastness of Mongolia. Oh and just stand in awe of the wonder that is the Aurora Borealis at Bear Park. Gaze at the splendour of Russia's famed architectures. Touch the glass castles. See pandas. Ride dolphins. Touch llamas.... and I could go on forever.

Asia? Of course. Savour the food of Taiwan. Feel the pulse of Tokyo, the rush of adrenaline. Zone out at the Zen temples in Japan, standing under almond blossoms. Discover the heart of Asia. Absorb the passion of Hong Kong. The warmth and gentleness of the Thais.Taste curry and the spices of India. Immerse in the colours and fragrance of the Arabic nations. The sounds. The language. The diversity.

with all these .... how can we ever let ourselves get so sucked up in our day to day work; to the point where we forget that out there, these wonders exist. Having stood for centuries, they stand still. Waiting ... Beckoning...

Life.... that's life!!

I dread the day I become so narrow minded that all I see is what is around me; climbing the corporate ladder, running the rat race, forgetting the big picture.

If that is life, well .... what then is the point?

what is love?

Theologus: Amare autem?
Philosophus: Felicitate alterius delectari

Theologian: But what is to love?
Philosopher: To be delighted by the happiness of another

and that, is what love is

-.-

12:50pm
me: grey skies, please go away, go far far away

12:52pm
the skies opened up and poured down bucketsfull of rain

raining...
pouring....
soaking, drenching, rain

l o v e

love opens up the universe for you,
showing wonders never before seen, heard, touched and felt
to have known your love is to have touched life
and having touched life, I know what love is
~ grace

"The minute I heard my first love story,
I started looking for you,
Not knowing how blind that was
Lovers don't finally meet somewhere
They're in each other all along." Jalal ad-Din Rumi

"Your task is not to seek love,
but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it"

"There is a sacredness in tears,
There are not the mark of weakness but of power
They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues
They are messengers of overwhelming grief...and unspeakable love" Washington Irving

"Don't grieve. Anything you lose comes around in another form"

"Only from the heart can you touch the sky"

mabelline

you left us
how could i have not known
i always thought you'd be a beauty queen
a fashionista at the very least

i still remember your face
your smile; a radiant beam breaking forth like sunshine
your voice; calling out to me
taunting, teasing, calling me to go with you

life; fleeting and fragile
here today, gone tomorrow

you feel so real still
see you in my mind
will i always remember?
will i see you again

to let you go or hold you near
i wish you didn't have to go

you were so young, so full of life
i'm sorry you had to go

but here we remain
remain in our hearts, remain in our lives

memory

memory

ever waiting

ever elusive, i wait to see your face
ever near, i sense your gentle breath
hovering just beyond my grasp, how cruel can it be?
i sense your presence, i feel you near me
yet why, why can't I see your face...?

fate taunts us, delighting in our helplessness
bringing us near yet never letting our paths cross

we smile, blocking the pain within

we live, yet another day will dawn

so live....for another day will dawn.

what month is it???

time is relative when you're in the magazine line.
we think so much ahead that sometimes we're just lost to the world.
like today, we just finished 'august' and we're starting to work on 'september' but one look at the calendar and hey! it's only July man!

sheesh....

oh and by the way, i finally finished reading. am done with it all (for the august issue anyway). i LOVE to read but not like this. haha. i mean, when you have to read the same article over and over again, word by word, comma by comma, you get kinda sick of it after a while. especially when it's a technically challenging article; on subjects you have absolutely no idea about YET you can NOT speed read or zoom over it. even when you literally see stars on the papers. oh man... but well, all's done. and i'm happily going to stay away from papers for two entire days.

'after the rain' ramblings

woke up to the sounds of drip-drip, pitty patter
soft sounds of the rain...
silently falling,
softly washing away the gloom and dust of yesterday
i could choose to grumble at the grey sky
or i could choose to think .... everything will be clean and new again
after the rain .... hmmmmmmm
imagine the possibilities and beauty of the 'brand new'
dewy soft .... sparkling clean .... the freshest of scent .... mmmm what beauty

brilliant and beautiful

i love selecting the 'shuffle all' function on my mp3. You never know what you will get and it makes you wonder and then smile at the totally random song.

tis a brand new day...it's beautiful and it's going to be great

pain keeps us human

pain keeps us human
once in a while, a jab or two reminds us to keep our feet firmly planted on the ground
instead of getting our head stuck in the clouds; to look around
hey! reality beckons ok?
life IS beautiful but a breaking heart need not be all pain ....
it can be ... heart wrenching (yes) but it is also cleansing ... it reins us in, holds us and reminds us that there IS beauty in restoration... there is beauty in watching pieces come whole again and there IS beauty in waiting for healing ... there is beauty in finding a never-thought-possible strength in you and there is beauty in just being completely broken .....
if you'll only let Him in

pumps?

my bright orange 'perk me up' pumps

what the hell

ahhh!!! u know what? i woke up happy, and i dressed happily. i put on my brand new, bright orange pumps and happilyleft home. THEN I saw the cars (again!!) and after 2 hours on the a 1.5km stretch of road, i considered screaming, throwing things out the window or just crying.

see for yourself from my pics on the random album and this rubbish

http://news.my.msn.com/regional/article.aspx?cp-documentid=1563952

just a line?

Pablo Picasso's 'Camel'

Tell me:

Masterpiece or Doodle?
Just a line?
Just an animal?
What else do you see?

malaysia...truly malaysians

This is a common sight on the roads here

Won't even comment on it

progression or regression

i was thinking...can we safely say that the conveniences of modern technology has actually stunted 'true' creativity. I mean nowadays, we don't see a lot of Chagalls, Van Goghs, even Warhol and Picasso. we DO see a lot of people trying to emulate them but those who come out with something truly their own yet is so stunning that we go ...wow; over and over... not really.

even the music arena isn't doing as great. Yes, we have uber-techno and funkier beats nowadays but I kinda miss those clean beautiful melodies or Menken and Webber. THOSE are true melodies and inspiration.

We rely so much on technology to jazz up our creations nowadays that the 'heart' and base of it is not there. Or maybe, not as ... pure.

i dread the day we become so tech savvy that we lose touch with the purity and simplicity around us. what if we forget how to communicate sincerely?
the beauty of waiting and longing for a letter to arrive ... the sounds and sights around us .....

"pickiness is a form of rationalized avoidance".

oh dear... i read something disturbing

it says that "pickiness is a form of rationalized avoidance". I've always justified that I'm single because I haven't met 'him' and yes... I'm picky. If I go by that statement...then it means that I am actually avoiding something....am I??

morning morning

lately, when the alarm rings in the morning, my first thought is- "what day is it? am i going to work?? oh no... it IS a work day!!" and then I snooze a bit, and very very reluctantly tumble out of bed after a 9 minute snooze (yes exactly that). after tumbling and stumbling out of my bedroom, i blindly walk into the bathroom by rote and do the necessary stuffs to look human.

I LOVE my job. Don't get me wrong. But i'm just not a morning person. I've often tried to get into the habit of waking early. You know- savouring the freshness of the day; the quiet and crisp morning air that is just not found any other time of the day. I've tried over and over yet .... no I couldn't get up, and I still can't do it.

Is it just me? Sigh.... haha

Maybe SOMEDAY, when I'm motivated enough, I will.

sadly...that's the way it still is

friend: how's the drama in your country?
me: still stupid....

I try to refrain from using the word stupid. I find it ...demeaning and just..not a nice word but honestly, in this situation, I have no other words but that.

930,980 words in the English language (or more) and only that one word comes to mind when you think of a country's government....- absolutely heartbreaking

a feast for the eyes

...his abstract post-impressionist style with biblical undertones embodies a deep passion for life, while still maintaining a zest for the whimsical, and at times, childish. These characteristics give Marc Chagall paintings a unique richness that few other artists of his time were capable of...

My faves:

Le Cirque
The Blue House
Concert
Alecko and Zemphira by Moonlight
Daphnis & Chloe
The Arabian Nights

road checks?? I don't think so

tumbled out of bed....drove to church half asleep and gasped (shocked!) at the huge line-up of cars on the next lane. Smacks forehead and goes, of course. Police are conducting road blocks and checking cars on the pretext of stopping those going for the demonstration. What demonstration? The one protesting the fuel hike, splashed all across the newspaper. Really, Malaysia is not bad- has advanced to the stage where protests are held, oopps, peaceful protests I mean. Yeah, very peaceful because nothing ever happens.

Sure, it causes awareness but more than not, it gives many many others more inconvenience when our beloved higher offices refuses to budge but counter attack by hassling our lives with fabricated stories, dramas and inconsiderate actions. what the?? It irritates people who are so non-political, like me, to actually consider doing something.

Sure enough, 'troops' were deployed to actually carry out car inspection and road blocks for two WHOLE days (round the clock!!). Come on, I'm sure there are more urgent and better things for our armed forces to do than to stand around all day waving cars by. Not like they're really checking. And even if they do, how are they to tell who's a demonstrator and who's not?? =.=

immortal beloved

Love demands everything and that very justly - thus it is to me with you, and to your with me. But you forget so easily that I must live for me and for you; if we were wholly united you would feel the pain of it as little as I

My heart is full of so many things to say to you - ah - there are moments when I feel that speech amounts to nothing at all - Cheer up - remain my true, my only treasure, my all as I am yours. The gods must send us the rest, what for us must and shall be

Yes, I am resolved to wander so long away from you until I can fly to your arms and say that I am really at home with you, and can send my soul enwrapped in you

Oh continue to love me - never misjudge the most faithful heart of your beloved.

ever thine
ever mine
ever ours


ps: no i'm not that brilliant...it's by the much admired Beethoven

blue day

I wore this colour today. Am supposed to be 'royal blue' but not feeling very royal now...more like just feeling blue, plain blue.

Usually, I drop out of bed and after brushing my teeth, bathing and checking my mail, I literally pop out of house- perky and ready to have face the fun of the day. But today ...

maybe it's the grey skies
or maybe it's Friday
or maybe it's because the office is kinda empty with most of everyone on leave
....

I should go eat something extremely spicy to kick me out of this blue. I must.

randomcrazilicious

more than one friend said I'm random ;) haha... I'm not. I just, seriously, have many thoughts. I love, love, LOVE life and everything around and thus I am randomcrazilicious!

asian sport

a dear person I know commented that shopping is actually a sport for Asian women and I totally agree

yes/no?

all it took was 5 minutes in Mid Valley

My July Heels!!

01072008

happiness

something fun and great happened yesterday. hmmm besides the small fact where I went shopping. ok ok, will write that in too. I bought 3 (!!) pairs of heels (I couldn't choose and I was alone so I bought all three. 1 metallic purple pair, 1 black peep toe with gold sequinns and 1 white pair with checked front). Sigh... SO satisfied.

Anyway, back to the interesting thing that happened.

I was at the post office waiting for my turn. There were about 80 people ahead and I settled in for a good read. There was a pregnant woman sitting beside me and being the observant me, I noticed that she was next in turn. Problem is, she was dozing off. She must have had a long wait and I gentled poked her so that she wouldn't miss her turn. Delighted, she asked me to join her and thus skip the long wait.

Now, some may think that it is, in a sense, jumping queue. But firstly, I didn't ask for it. And secondly, what I wanted to do wouldn't have taken more than 3 minutes.

Isn't it great when you get to do good deeds? It is for me. I feel instantly cheered up and just all-around-great when I know I've made someone's day. Whether in a very very small way or otherwise.

Cliched as it sounds (watch Pay it Forward), it IS true that a good deed goes a long long way.

Besides, I just love being a happy person. In fact, a childish wish of mine is to be a fairy (the size of Tinkerbell) who goes around sprinkling sparkly happy dust on people.

That's happiness isn't i?