3am notes

lately the sleeping pattern has been quite crap, for lack of a stronger word. going to bed at midnight, i lay awake and wander the hours away. other times, going to bed at 9pm, the world rushes to yet another party while i fall and tumble into a dreamless sleep. unbidden, i'd come awake sometime between the dead of night and the wake of dawn.

most remarkably, i realized that lately, i have been writing in my sleep. no. i rephrase. i have been writing half asleep. maybe my muse is delighting itself, nudging me at 3am nightly, but come that hour, perhaps not precisely at 3am, but when the hands of the clock glow at that hour, a line would come. a dream-like phrase of beauty sneaks in, and i can't but come awake and make it real.

stay in my head, i thought. yet i knew even as i thought, neglected, it would flee.

like an unwanted love, left alone, shrivel and die it will.

3am notes. my dreams or yours?

spare me now and let me dream.